A perkewleear Sittinsatday

It haz been ravver a perkewleear day tooday. Waz kwite ordinry wen I woke up, I went in gardin for mornin toilet duties n had my brekfust as ushul. Then I cweepd bak to big bed fer some deep finkin time:

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Mum waz callin me but I didn’t come down til nine of clock as so much finkin to do. I had my long walk at lunchin time, it waz sunny wen we did leave but wile we waz owt it rained, it hailed n it snowed as well as vewy windy. I was soakered compleetly n fweezin cold. Then did sum sulkin wen I saw my fwends Poppy, Joules, Moley n Rohan were at the game fair near Knawidge. I saw the tweets they waz sendin n it waz sunny n they waz havin sum yummy noms! Lukky pals, I iz glad they did hav such gud time.
Waz time to go to stabuls n I did do a vewy amazin fing wot I haz nevver dun befaw. I was havin kwiet snooter in orse fud room n fownd little mowse under a sak. I fink he was serpwized too n he was wude so I put der bitey on him. Didn’t reely meen to be murderin him but all der hoomins was tellin me I was clevver so I was vewy pwowd! My negst job was to stop de fesants fiting in the feeld so I chased them away.
Then we went fer last walk and it was at leest sunny. We went to common and I nearly cort a skwizzel! Here I iz givin him der stare:

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And we went to see Mrs Pig n her piggerlets. I likes them vewy muchly but I iz not allowd to play wiv dem. Mum always callin them bacon sarnies but this not makin much sens to me.

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As we carried on owr walk I chased a wabbit under some gorse bushes n wud not come when I waz called. This made Mum kwite cwoss but I was wonderin wot wud happen if I put the bitey on a wabbit. Suddenly I weelised Mum waz neerly bak to the car so I had to wun farst acwoss the common to catcher up, only to come acwoss a moley hill wich I had to digger in of corse!

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So it waz a vewy bizzy day espeshuly fer a satsittinday wiv vewy stwanj wevver but a pwowd moment doin mowse murderin.

Orses!

I iz shur menny ovver BTs hav to suffer blinkin orses in theyr lifs too, not just me. But dis is wot I am finkin bowt blasted cweeturs. Fer start it sez in bweed infermashun that BTs shud be able to follow orse all day. Wot? I iz not followin enny orse enny where let lone all days.That iz just wude.

Mum haz alwayz had dese anifurs, fer weesons I don’t unnerstan. Barty, wot is name of pesky orse we duz hav, iz much older than I iz and alweddy waz there wen I awwived. But I soon weelized I shud be senter of Mum’s egsistuns n he iz just disstwakshun. Plus he iz always wantin stuff wich costs munny I cud use fer impawtunt perchasis like noms n toys. All I hears iz “Barty needs”…new wug, new shoos, the dentist, his saddul checkin or stuffin or somefin. Then fud! Boy, can that fing eet! He is nevver stoppin wiv munchin saks n saks fud,hooj bundulls hay, caruts, appuls, tweats, mints. Here is foto of ugly fing lookin moff eaten ( he iz not stripped but shaved n haz to keep frunt half of fayse furry as iz grate big hed is emptee n gets lot of cold air in)

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I duz sometime go wiv him in wuds where there is no woads to go on n I kwite enjoyz it, not cos I am wiv der orse AND I iz definatly not followin beehind of him, but cos we can go farster than wen Mum is twudgin along in wellinton boots!

Fer long time we had littel lowwy fer orse n that wuz gud cos he was shovvered inthe bak wile I wud be in frunt cab wiv Mum helpin ter dwive n cud fergit he wuz even there! It waz gud as we went playces where I cud wotch wot was happenin in warmf of lowwy and ennyway I duz like twavellin vewy muchly. We evven went on holibobs to stay wiv a mad woman in Dorrset’s howse wiv de orse too. She iz vewy nice woman but iz also mad, she haz lots hoomins n orses to stay at her hoam, but only speshul furs like me.

Furst time I went ther was bit of uppset as I fownd small hole in fence of gardin and went aventurin fru it. Ovver side I did find chikkins fer furst time n waz havin splendid time of chaserin them befaw enormus wow, lots bad werds n big twubbles. Lukky mad woman waz not likin naybor n fownd all vewy funny but Mum was cwoss n sed I cudnt come ovver times if I did this. Pfft!

Ennyways, I is digwessin, manely az chasin chikkins is more intwestin than witin bowt orses. I iz finkin dat orses is wun of most stoopid cweeturs wot egsist in wurld. Barty sleeps in stabul n playz all day in nice feeld. So why duz he let Mum tak him owt n mak him cawwy her wownd countweesides? Mum has vewy gud feets n legs of her own, duznt need orse. Big confusment to me.

Gud fing bowt him bein stoopid iz he duznt weelize I carnt stand his fur at enny pwice n wud murders him if I cud. I duz show him dis by bitin him wenevver I get charnce but dusnt seem to hurt him ceptin on hiz fat nose. He haz lurned that if I wants his fud he must giv it to me or I will biter nose which is wun fing at leest. Here I iz bwavely gardin stoopid fing wot iz cowhawdly hidin in stabul az scared of evewyfing, speshly vets.

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Wun time Mum deesided to hav fotos taken wiv me to comemwate a big burfday, carn’t tell yoo wich as I dusnt be able to cownt that hi on my paws. We got in lowwy n went to posh fotogwaffy place. It waz all wite indors wiv umbwellas n vewy nice laydy takin fotos of me wiv Mum in bakgwownd. Then, vewy wude! She sez bring in orse! Yes, in MY fotograffy seshun. She takin piktchas of all of uz but I did put on sulkin fayce fer that. He waz spoylin bewtifull fotos of me!

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It duz seem I as to put up orse as not goin away, n my plan to sell him didn’t werker owt vewy well. Leest orse is not livin in owse or even in gardin so I can fergit bowt him sum of time. Not like if we did hav catt!

So my simpaffy is wiv all my BT pals like Harrison and Eric who also havs these cweeturs affektin their lifs. Sum hoomins gwows owt of dem so hoap fer Eric, but as Mum alweddy of ainshunt age I iz not so lukky! Pfft!

My Sunday outin

Yesterdy was sunnyday and az it was also not wainin Mum finally agweed to tak me to the dog ewent at Newberry. We awwanjed to meet Teddy Bear and Freddie frum the BT Posse there. I was kwite weleeved as I had fort Mum wuz goin to say I cudnt go.

Wen we awwived at the show there waz much q’in to get into car parking n Mum duz not like that muchly. And then more q’in at gate to pay munny. I was kwite happy, I waz saying hellos to all ovver furs n we did see kwite a few ovver BTs.

Freddie n Teddy bov awwived just afta me so we had gud timins! We had stwoll wownd to se wot waz wot. Teddy took his famly shoppin, he wanted a bandanna! Yoo can just see him here twyin it on:

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There waz fings yoo cud joyn in wiv. Some mad furs were leepin off into a tank ov cold wata, seein hoo cud jump furvest. OMDT waz I goin do anyfing stoopid as that. There waz also some ajillitee kit but vewy long q so we all fort cum bak laters. But then it was closed up so noboddy got to twy.

There was some fings fer gun dogs fer retreevin n a lesson to lurn bowt flyball. I iz never goin to be intewested in ball gayms tho. A man twied to get Mum to buy tickets to win hooj stuffered furs but Mum not wantin those so we just put few pennies in kerlekshun. I kwite liked big furs, dey waz biggern me! Cud hav made lots mess at hoam wiv pullin their insides owt!

Then we did talk abowt wat els to do! We had seen de husky dogs pullin bikes n fings, one wescue wun wiv fur shavered off n wun wiv only 3 legs. Wot next?

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Hoomins wanted eat sumfing, speshly boy of Freddie. I hav noted boy hoomins always eatin fud much like me n I cud heer his tummy wumblin even ovver Freddie yappin! So we wated payshuntly wile they had fud, nuffin fer uz ceptin few tweats n dwink wata.

Den we did sum wunnin waces! I was much farster on the wecall hurdle wace than peoples fort! Less than 10 sekuns! Freddie n Teddy bof did lure chase too, Freddie weally got after lure n corted it at end. I didnt twy this as I only chases weel wabbits n skwizzels.

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This waz foto of boyz waitin to wun. They iz my appwentises n vewy gud at lurnin ways to do fings.
I fink ther waznt any bweed of fur not at this show, there waz fun classes to enter but we waz awwivin bit late fer them. BTs waz well wepwesented but don’t fink ther were any ovvers frum the posse there. Wun odd fing happend, hoomins were given box pasta sorce mixes. Mum stoppd on way hoam n I did twy wun, wile she waz gon, just to see wot this be like. Not vewy nice,vewy dwy n powdry. No wunder dey was given the stuff!

It waz nice day owt tho, n gud fer yung boyz to soshaliz. They waz bof egstweemly well behayved n cwedit to de Posse! If dis show, All Abowt Dogs is neer yoo then wud wecommend you go!
Thats all I fink!

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Doggy daycare

I fort I wud explayne abowt wy I duz go to daycare n wot I finks abowt it.

Wen my Mum brung me hoam I was only 7 weeks owld and she took pawturneety leeve to stay wiv me fer 2 weeks. In that time I wisited my Gwanny to lurn abowt her n my furunkl Blue who waz a gwayhownd n alsos abowt her howse.

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Wuns Mum went bak to werk I wud go evewyday cept satsittindays and sunnydays to stay wiv Gwanny. Dis waz gwate plan, Gwanny sumtimes had ovver fwends dogs to stay wen der hoomins on holibobs too so plenty furs to teech me rite ways to play n behayv. Wen Mum went aways wiv werk I stayed wiv Gwanny too.

But end of larst Septemburr it waz vewy sad n Gwanny suddenly had bad hart pwoblem n no longur was wiv uz. Mum waz vewy sad n lots fings chainjd. Mum woz vewy wurried abowt me too as I iz alwite on my own fer few owrs but she is away in Lundun fer long times doin der werk. Fer few weeks she wuz werkin less time n I manidged bwavelee wiv havin jest an owr wlk at lunchintime. But wuz cleer fwr Mum this waz not purmamunt sollooshun. Then Mum did much surchin n fownd Tomcarer in Winser.He haz pwoper bizniss lookin aftur furs n came to owr howse so we cud all meets eech ovver. I liked Tom n he did like me too so wuz agweed he wud hav impawtunt job of lookin aftur me. Here I iz on my vewy furst day wiv him and sum ovver furs wot he duz luk aftur:

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So nowdays Tomcarer or Jennyovvercarer colleks me frum hoam abowt half parst nine of clok. This means I gets up wiv Mum n haz time in gardin n bwekfust befaw secund sleeps fer bowt 3 owrs. At day care we haz walk, then nap then snak then walk sum playin novver walk then more chillin afaw I iz brunged bak hoam, wuffly six firty. Den I duz hav to wate fer Mum, sumtimes she alweddy hoam but sumtimes I haz to wate. I duznt mind as I iz kwite tired owt frum bizzy day. If Mum haz to stay weely late like aftur tens pm or not comin hoam then I gets sleepin ovver wiv Tom famly. So I iz happee. I even haz own beenybag at Tom hoam. I iz most weglar clyunt! I fink it vewy impawtunt to be called a clyunt! Mum iz also happee az Tom duz send fotos of wot I iz doin sumtimes too n she knows I iz sayf. So this iz werkin vewy well fer uz n meens I can stay livin wiv Mum.
Dis be me wun day doin diggin at daycare, I not shur wot I waz lookin fer, pwobabl moleys.

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Repawting frum St Albans

Yesfurday, I wuz lukky enuff to agen meet wiv some border tewwier pals in St Albans. This was made possybul by kynez of Betty n her hoomum, Stella who did all der sortin owt n organizin. They also cookered sum peanut muffin wot is almust as gud as toona cayke!

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We met in a park n it wuz bizzy wiv lots hoomins and furs all njoyin sunshinin. We even saw 2ovver BTs but dey wudnt join uz n their hoomin sed they waznt fwendly. They did luk fine to me, I fink it waz hooman hoo waznt fwendly! Here is foto of uz all wiv our hoomins:

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So yoo know who is wot, I will giv names, but not hoomins as nofur be intwested in that! So left to wight we has Freddie, Millie n Marmie, Rohan, me (Ted), Betty and Otis.
We did hav sum wunnin after balls furst fer them that like this – I haz nevver bin a fan. Freddie fort the throwing stick wud be better than the ball to play wiv!
After this we did go fer a walk wite awownd the lake. It waz gweat fun seein all birds n wotchin Otis twyin to gwab bwead from the kwackers. We also seen a baby bunny wot waz not fwitened of uz at all. I did chase him a little so he lurned to wun down his buwwow, n stuk my hed down n tolled him to be mor careful wownd furs!
The we had sum egsitement as Otis sploshed into lake! His hoodad pullered him owt kwik n he woz vewy bwave n zoomied wownd n wolled in leafs to get dwy. But he did hav funny furstile afterwuds.
Befaw we went to pub gardin we pawsed for fotos n Rohan’s dad giv uz sum tweats:

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We all had sum tho I don’t know where waz Betty n Rohan just wanted his tennis ball. Then we went to luvly pub, warm in sun so hoomins cud hav lunchers. We had mor tweats including somefing vewy speshul wot Otis Mum had cookered – a hewj bocks full of sossiges! Even Rohan did ferget his ball then! I was really shokked that poor Betty had never had pwoper sossige befaw as her hoomins is vegetubls or sumfing but she seemd to wealize kwikly how nommy dey iz!
Millie n Marmie shud hav wun pwize fer best behayvr, dey woz vewy gud n fwendly. It waz a weally luvly day owt n fanks to amazin map wot Mr Clapton n his typist haz dun I finks der will be many more of these jolly border tweetuppers. Well, that iz all I got say on this egsepped I must lurn Mum to stop wiv all de blah n tak mor fotos.

Fud cwimes

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I iz genrally vewy well behavd n Mum is pwowd that she can takes me ennywears n I duz behayv. But as soon as there is fud abowt is diffrent matter!

If I iz at hoam then I will help myself to any fud I can weach – I climb onto tables or worksurfiss if chairs arent tuckered in. I jump and gwab too. My best tekneek is to stand in kitchin on back legs and feel along surfiss wiv frunt paw. If I duz feel sumfing I pulls it down and if it is fud then hooway! I eats it!

At nitetime I alwayz patwols the howse as soon as lites owt to mak shur there is no fud left out – this is a chor as if the fud is not disposed ov then it cud be helf hazad by next day!

If we duz go near shops then Mum needs to put fud in car boot or I will help myself – wecently she poppd in fer suet fer makin dumplins, went to pay fer petwol and by time she returned suet waz all eated up! Again this is chor to save callarees going on Mum’s waste!

We also haz horse in fambly, I pwobably menshunned he befaw, n I duz like to take his fud. He iz kwite dum n even lets me tak carruts frum out his mowf! He dwops lots of his ceweal fud on flor of staybul so I can eats it. Not shur if he bein kind n sharin wiv me or is just vewy messy at eatin!

In summer I duz lov joinin in picnics helpin myself to sanwidges. And of corse BBQs are my favrit cos there be always sossiges!20130404-112954.jpg

But lately Mum been finin me fer fud cwimes by usin my tweat allowuns, my own munny, to buy flowrs and weplace fud wot I haz stolen. And I haz to wite soppy notes, fer dogs sakes, “I iz so sorry I did steal yor wotever luvs frum Ted”. I haz to cwoss my paws wen witing this cos I iz not sowwy at all, only sowwy I waz cort! Pfft!

I hav bin livin my life of cwime since I waz abowt 9 monfs old, befaw that as a pup, I was too bizzy playin to be intrusted in fud. Mum finks ther is link to my nonuts opewayshun but no pwoof! She dusn’t fink I will ever be wehabillytaytd so we pwaktiss cwime pwevenshun now!

Impawtunce of sleep

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Tooday I fort I wud wite abowt the impawtunse of sleep. We must mayke shur we get enuff, n bestt if yoo can pawswade yer hoomins to let yoo sleep on big bed wiv dem. I haz always insisted on this tho my former Hoodad wazn’t keen so we did weach a compwomiz n I sleeped on my beanbag by side of bed.

Az all BTs know we needs fwekwent naps durin day, pweferably sunpuddlin fer at leest wun to mak shur we gets vitamin D wot we need fer helfy bowns.

We also need snoozin after meels and wests after walkz. Fer optymum helf we need at leest 8 howrs sleeps at nite and anuvver 8 hrs durin day split into naps. Larst nite I had a tewibble nite, Mum was westless and lite went on, off, on, off, weeding n wigglin. I gwumbled and sighed a lot then I marched downstairs to my beanbag Pfft! I hurd pleedin hoomin voice, Ted, Teddy callin but I did harden my hart az I knew I had to get my sleeps. (But I did kweep bak laters in nite wen Mum did be sleepin so we cud hav a mornin cuddles).

So pleez be wememberin how impawtunt it is to get enuff nappin and mayke shur yor hoomins dusnt interwupt it even if it duz seem like yoo is bein meany to them! Happy Dozin!

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